Despite now having internet in my house (True!), I still have failed to update my blog regularly. Maybe this is because we have only had a few daylight hours of electricity recently, maybe it is because seeing things like goats on motorcycles and a rooster drinking a beer with its owner have become more normal to me and therefore I assume they wouldn’t stand out to you back in the states either. Either way, more frequent and shorter posts are in order including the “Picture of the Week”:
Picture of the Week
A “cacata”/tarantula taking in some important business advice at my Construye Tus Sueños meeting on Friday.
Quiz
Which of the following did I see/experience on my travels to the grocery store yesterday?
A. Lawyer who lives in the neighborhood explains to the colmado how there is an “intelligent gonorrhea” strain taking over Europe, before teaching me the word for “crabs” (not cangrejo crabs)
B. I watch the ground moving and tire spinning through a hole in the bus floor, before getting off at my stop for the supermarket conveniently located in front of a “love motel”
C. A “blind” man breaks character to look directly at me (the only white/touristy face in a sea of Dominicans walking through an outdoor market) asking “Sir, can you fill my hat [with your American money]?”
D. Upon my arrival home, the mother pig living in back of my house breaks loose startling the dog who was taunting it
Correct Answer: E. All of the Above.
A. Most days for me start and finish with a trip to the colmado conveniently located steps from my front door where Wilkin, who has turned into one of my closer friends in the neighborhood, works 7 days a week from 7am-10pm. So as I started my day by passing through and “saludar”ing the colmado, Freddy a local attorney who likes to crack the occasional egg of knowledge began going off on his conocimiento de STI’s. This included a comical demonstration (above clothes thankfully) and joke of how to rub rum and sand from your junk to your trunk to get the crabs drunk . Once they’re drunk, according to Freddy and his joke, they throw the little rocks back and forth until they kill each other off. I also learned the word for crabs is “ladillas” – not to be confused with “ardillas” (squirrels) as I originally mistook the word.
B. The beat-up, run down guaguas that run my route (Route 66) usually give a 10 peso discount. They credit it to the lack of AC, but I think of it as an apology for the condition of the seats and general state of the vehicle. Despite having a hole underneath my feet for the ride, this bus actually also had AC, so I had to pay full price.
C. This cracked me up just for the simple fact that I didn’t say or do anything to reveal to the “blind” guy that I was a man or where my location in the crowd of people was. Nonetheless, he put down his improvised white cane, picked up his hat and through his sun glasses looked directly at me, calling me “señor” to ask for change.
D. Pretty self explanatory and funny watching a large pig break loose as doñas call for husbands and niños to come corral the beast
Danny Kaplan
Do you have the urge to pit roast the puerco? For obvious reasons, I’m not going to comment on the attorney spewing STD info. Great post! We miss you.
Haha, just a little. There is a family in the neighborhood that is known for their roasted pork and have a few locations between here and the capital where they sell it
When you mentioned the crabs I was reminded of the great Phil Ochs song “The Marines have Landed on the Shores of Santo Domingo.” Youtube it for a bit of 1965 DR history. Maybe you will like Phil better than Tom Waits?
Haha, Phil is better, but anyone’s better than Tom Waits, he’s “hardly even music”: http://www.southparkstudios.com/clips/388602/its-hardly-even-music
I know, neithr Phil nor Tom come anywhere near Bonecrusher. I was going to try to put a Bcrusher picture in my avatar but I don’t know how. Jason Bay crashed into the wall again last night and was booed by Mets fans as he staggered off the field.